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Thread: How's everybody doing?

  1. #11
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    West Wales
    Posts
    200
    I think loneliness goes hand in hand with disability, I have my wife & 3 teenage kids but apart from them and doctors I have not spoken to anyone else for years.
    The hardest thing for me is either the constant pain or being 'zonked' & half asleep.
    I'm 56 and it's no life.

  2. #12

    hi richard

    hi richard after reading what you have been through,yet you do so much for others with great advice and being a senior member of this forum must take up a lot of your daylight hours,its no wonder you had to get a night time hobby....good luck to you and i wish you well

  3. #13
    hi tinker,im in similar situation ,i dont feel like going out much...but when i do,i can never think of anywhere to go...ive become so withdrawn i dont even answer the phone

  4. #14
    hi fizzy pink ,that is something this esa has not really taken into account the constant pain we all suffer

  5. #15
    Senior Member RaeUK's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Location
    in a world of my own ...
    Posts
    567
    If a friend can't see you and take you for who you are then they're not really a friend. They also forget that illness and disability can strike anyone at any time, makes you wonder how they'd feel and cope under the same circumstances. Richard and shybiker are added to my list of inspirational people ...

  6. #16
    thankyou for your kind words raeuk,youve just made me feel good....kind words can heal....

  7. #17
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    195
    Many thank for the kind comments, but I'm no different from anybody else on here, we are all here for one reason – to find support in one another, to give advice and more so to try and stop people worrying too much before medicals ect.
    We all have our crosses to bear, but it is a fact of life some bigger than others, with the bigger crosses it can do two things it can drag you down or make you stronger and to most it will do the latter.

  8. #18
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    1,803
    You know I have found one of the trickiest things is hiding your health issues.
    People even family and friends aren't comfy around people with health issues, so you tend to play them down. Non moreso than with children, no one wants to upset their children and what purpose would it serve if they knew how ill you were.
    The only problem with both situations then is that they forget you are ill and with friends they actually think there is nothing wrong.
    The other aspect is that you hide your issues from yourself as it makes it easier to get along with the beast.
    I think it is one of those things that only someone in the situation can fully understand and I think an aspect of lonleyness comes from that being unable to really share your feelings on the beast.
    Anyway, as my Aunty would say, the cemetary is full of people who'd swap places with you.

  9. #19
    real wise words....i actually at times feel ashamed of my disabilities,life has at times been a real struggle....ive had stalls on the markets ,had cut price style shops a pet shop and a garden centre not all at once....the things i have noticed is staff try to take you for a fool...and people who trade with you treat you as if you no have common sense....i gave up about 20 years ago

  10. #20
    New Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Location
    Staffordshire
    Posts
    4
    Reading your posts reminds me how lucky I am. I have CP and have had it all my life. I was born very,very premature with my twin brother. At birth, he suffered a lung defect (effectively his lung was 3 times too big and was crushing his heart) so, as he came out first all attention went to him. When I came out a few minutes later, I stopped breathing for minutes which caused the CP.

    I have had some amazingly difficult times both physically and mentally whilst trying to "grow up" exclusion, bullying etc, etc as I'm sure you have all experienced in one form or another but, where I was lucky was the attitude my family adopted possibly because of my twin who after a major op recovered fully. Their approch was to almost "ignore" the disability. I had physio theraphy until I was 16 and all the usual medical appointments you associate with CP but, I was placed in mainstream schooling and taught to be no different then anyone else. That attitude has served me well as the pepole I count as my friends see me not the disability.

    I get knackered, I have no balance and I have a shuffle rather than a walk but, all these quirks make me who I am now. I get frustrated as I cannot lift the washing upstairs or carry my daughter but, each day I am finding new ways to do things everyone takes for granted and I do have to admit in taking amusement in getting up out of my wheelchair in a public place to either reasch something or use it as a trolly or pushchair! I enjoy challenging people's views on phyisical disability and really Love supporting others in being comfortable in who they are.

    My most recent "get around the obsticle" moment - Getting all the bags my daughter brings home from school to the car..... people don't know where to look when I go whizzing past with a peppa pig lunch bag between my teeth! Remember, keep moving forward because it's the only way to change and shape others around you. XxX

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