Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 25

Thread: Views on being called a cripple today ..

  1. #1
    Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Location
    Watford
    Posts
    48

    Views on being called a cripple today ..

    I want to put this out there I am a little bit upset by this as I think is this how people see me. After all I am only 51 ..
    I went to the NW London breast screening clinic this morning for a routine mammogram I chose that one as it has blue badge parking no steps etc... Anyway I went in said Hello to receptionist she said Hello handed me a pink for to fill in and pointed to the chairs I said can I stand here and do this as I won't be able to get up from the very low seats she said hang on.She shouted over to a lady in the one chair that had arms and was a higher chair "Excuse me can you sit on another seat please this lady needs to sit there she's a 'cripple' " ! She immediatly knew she had said something wrong as my mouth fell open.
    I said calmly "I am not a cripple I am a lady with chronic arthiritis who can not always walk or sit easily" I added that I am furious someone working for the NHS refers to patients in that manner.I also said I am so embarrased to be spoken to like this and said It is awful at my age to be seen as a cripple and so loudly too. She rushed of to the screening rooms. Came back a few minutes later and said by her desk. Can I appoligise to you all for using such innapropiate words .... I said No you should be appoligising to me directly. She did. The 15 other patients and relatives in the waiting area looked embarrased too. 3 said you took that calmly I said don't let my calmness fool you.I am angry and feel hurt people see me like that ..
    What are your views on this ? the radiographer said she is embarrased nd upset as to what she had said and if I want to speak to the centre manager I could.I said I would think about it as felt rather numb at the moment.
    The radiographer was pleasant and profesional .

  2. #2
    New Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    15
    Absolutely awful and not acceptable from anyone, let alone someone working in the NHS. Regardless of her apology I would write a formal complaint. She perhaps need to go on some Disability Awareness Training!

  3. #3
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Location
    North Lincs
    Posts
    344
    I'm not surprised you were upset - that is such an offensive way to refer to someone, and in front of a room full of people too! She could have put it in a much more appropriate way and been much more tactful in finding you somewhere comfortable to wait. That kind of language goes back 60 years when it was deemed acceptable to refer to people as "cripples" and "retards"- times have moved on and this woman should not be working with the public if she thinks it's ok to use such unacceptable, outdated words!

  4. #4
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Posts
    441
    Of course you were upset; a horrible situation to be in.

    I'm writing my perspective here; I have cerebral palsy and was a little girl with a disability in the 1970's when language and attitudes were very different, and This will of course have coloured my thinking. The term cripple feels offensive (to me as well) to many people; in disability movements people talk about "crip humour" and are happy to identify themselves as "a crip", but I don't think that's particularly relevant to this situation.

    I've had a range of labels applied to me by strangers over the years, of course I don't like any of them. Actually I also dislike it when people talk about "the disabled" - I don't like being put in a special group in this way.

    But, I also think it's important to consider people's attitudes behind the words they use. It sounds like this lady recognised that you would be helped by a seat and tried to ensure that you got one. An NHS employee should certainly have some awareness of the language they use, and an awareness of the impact of this. It sounds like this lady did realise her choice of word was inappropriate, and it sounds as though she is genuinely sorry she upset you. As others have said there is obviously a training issue here, and I'm sure it would be helpful if you are able to write and explain how upsetting this situation was for you and how the word she used made you feel. But I think it's important to acknowledge her intention to help provide you with what you needed (or she thought you needed!). The language used around disability can be a minefield, and I find it helpful to think about the intention behind the words used - I find that people generally want to be helpful.

  5. #5
    Senior Member sea queen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    1,378
    This is an old fashioned word as is Mong and others.
    They were used and accepted in the past.
    They are now offensive and people do need to get up to speed with our correct terminology of peoples condition.
    Especially people who serving the public!!
    Sea Queen

  6. #6
    Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Location
    Watford
    Posts
    48
    I have always walked with a limp due to a deformed foot.But in recent few years my condition causes me to have pain etc all over now I use a rollator wheelchair or stick as in yesterday I used a stick.I find the word Cripple offensive and am fine with my best friend from childhood calling raspberry as in raspberry ripple as we have banter I call her geez as she is full of tattoos and pirecings.It is a fondness thing and no offense taken by her. Yesterday
    I also do not want to be labelled as disabled but I suppose I need a label ? ..... as I said to her I have mobility problems I am not a cripple. My head is in a fuzz over this.I worked for the local authority for 30 plus years prior to not being able to with a range of tenant could you imagine calling one an alchoholic or drug addict ie druggie or alkie or oldie ? It is not the way to speak when in a profesional position nor acceptable for anyone to be spoken to in this way.

  7. #7
    Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Location
    Watford
    Posts
    48
    Quote Originally Posted by RaspberryRipple View Post
    I don't mind the few occasions when I've been called a crip or cripple.
    After all I AM a cripple. I've had spastic, spaz, special, wheelie, Tiny Tim, look at her, check her, don't look, don't stare, dead legs, shorty, speedy. If you have a few come back clauses up your sleeve then it will give you confidence and will make light of the situation.

    http://http://www.youreable.com/foru...-disabled-when
    Hi,I have a sense of humour and see my post above.But It really is not acceptable to be called A CRIPPLE by NHS staff .

  8. #8
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    1,465
    all the old derogatory names will be back before long, thanks to the gov and their interpretation of (normal) people naratives.

  9. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    255
    Maybe you should just try to get over it. You've probably been called a lot worse - but just haven't heard it. I mean this sincerely. I have heard many people whisper under their breaths upon my disabled daughter approaching - mostly I ignore them - sometimes I glare until they have no option than to look away. My wife is much more robust - she will tell them straight - what the F did you just say; the bigots usually walk away with their head between their tails. Unfortunately, I think it is indeed a sign of the times, and this kind of thing is likely to get much worse before it gets better. It's all to do with current "popular discourse" basically, language people are currently hearing and using - in simple terms - monkey see or hear then monkey do. I have no doubt - it is being orchestrated by the right-wing gutter press on behalf of the Conservative government. Only a few months back whilst watching a debate in the commons (youth parliament) on Parliament TV (I should get out more), the speaker of the house John Bercow could be heard laughing and joking as he was using the term "retarded". So, this kind of ignorance is happening everywhere, unfortunately.

    Buster

  10. #10
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    255
    Quote Originally Posted by RaspberryRipple View Post
    I agree entirely Buster.
    My user name is Cockney Rhyming slang for Cripple. I'm actually a proud cripple!
    If I got upset about things like being offered I'd never go out... I laugh in the face of adversity and have a full and active life despite being a crip. I'm more important than my disability.
    What astonishes me RaspberryRipple is that we are in agreement for once - now there's a first! Seriously though I think you have the right attitude for you to face the world and be proud of who you are - so well done. of course for some people it's much harder to deal with verbal abuse or misguided ignorant derogatory comments - no matter how well meaning; some of us are more sensitive - especially when being on the receiving end of such treatment.

    It sounds like the receptionist who Cazachybones encountered had good intentions and didn't mean to offend anyone - indeed she later apologised - some credit has to be given to her in my opinion. Under these circumstances, If I was in Cazachybones's shoes, I certainly would not put in a complaint - It sounds like the receptionist got the message. If her intentions had been meant to ridicule or hurt Cazachbones's feelings - then that would be a different matter entirely.
    There again, I am not disabled so it's easy for people like me to have opinions - without really knowing how things are.

    In term of putting up with unquestionable abuse, I do now have a zero tolerance attitude when I hear or see disabled people being abused or victimised. Almost exclusively when I come across this happening it is disabled people with mental, cognitive or learning disabilities who are on the receiving end. For example, a couple of years ago, whilst out walking with my daughter and her friend, I heard from an open window, someone say quite loudly the term "mongies" (not sure about the spelling). Without question it was meant as an abusive term directed at the two young ladies I was walking with. When I got home - I phoned the police - and asked them to investigate it as a hate crime. Although I don't know if the police followed it through - they didn't get back in touch to let the victims know - now there's another debate!

    Buster

Similar Threads

  1. Self-employment - your views.
    By Lighttouch in forum Work - help & advice on work, training, jobs for disabled people
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 11-12-15, 18:44
  2. Motability called me today......IMPORTANT NEWS re PIP.
    By whiteswan123 in forum Motoring - help & advice on cars for disabled people, Blue Badge and Motability
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 10-04-15, 07:20
  3. Called ATOS today
    By MrsLovett in forum Benefits - help & advice on disability benefits, incapacity benefits, ESA and DLA
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 09-06-14, 19:29
  4. Pets - as in animals - your views
    By Lighttouch in forum News and general discussion
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 29-03-14, 16:38
  5. DLA Post your views of the DLA assesment
    By cliff1961 in forum Benefits - help & advice on disability benefits, incapacity benefits, ESA and DLA
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 12-04-12, 17:49

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •