View Full Version : Stressed..

14-09-13, 22:54
I am now apparently at the end of my work programme, so have to go to the job centre for a 'post work programme support appointment'

However, it's not at a convenient time..My mother accompanies me everywhere(I do not leave the house on my own) and she is at work at that time and it's too short notice to change her shift..

I've been told that I can't change my appointment under ANY circumstances, even after speaking to the manager. I said I would happily come in at any other time as my mother is off work from the Tuesday-Friday...but NO, they are sticking to the Monday, when she can't come with me and I have nobody else who can go with me....surely this is wrong?? I gave them a weeks notice(I received the letter this morning(14th sept, in case anyone is reading this on the sunday) but it wasn't good enough.

So now i'm in a panic about it...great.

Any help? I'm pretty sure this is classified as bullying..especially since I asked if the person who I'm seeing is a disability advisor and they said no.

15-09-13, 10:12
Can you speak to your Personal Advisor at the JC-? I am sure she would not allow you to be treated in this way.

Am I right in thinking then that you are in WRAG? Sorry I know you will probably have mentioned this in another post.

Yes honey, this is bullying! Do not allow it. If it were me, I would telephone this Manager and simply inform her/him that I will not be attending on the day/time she/he set because it is not convenient and put the phone down without giving time for a response. I would also let my PA know what I have done. Nothing is insurmountable, no-one in a managerial position is unable to rearrange an appointment.

Power gone crazy, you are the one who has a disability and they should work around that.

Others may disagree, however, I go on the offensive, and not defensive.

Stick up for yourself and don't allow this person to bully you - he/she can't do anything about it, get your PA on side.

Good luck hon and find your inner strength to stand up to them! :)

15-09-13, 21:55
Yes, i'm in WRAG. This will be my first appointment at the JCP, so I have no idea who my advisor is. I asked to speak to the person that will be conducting my appointment and she wouldn't budge. I then spoke to the manager who said I WILL be sanctioned if I don't have a valid reason, which mine wasn't, apparently. Not only that, the manager said it was strange that somebody would be coming with me as the jcp gets very busy. I again explained my SAD, agoraphobia and depression, and that I have not left the house alone for 12 years(since I was 13.)

I've had 3 panic attacks and a near asthma attack today just thinking about it. :(

15-09-13, 22:47
Don't worry hon, I truly believe you have a very valid reason. Just ensure you inform the JC so it is on computer record, and simply do not turn up. Await a further appointment.

How dare they put someone through this anxiety. Get a GP note if you have to, in fact it is probably a very good idea.

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16-09-13, 08:44
I've got to say this is the first time I have heard of that, when I phoned up saying I would be unable to come in they asked me to tell them when I could make it.

I would phone your MP and have a word these people are expected to work with us not against us.

16-09-13, 12:36
I phoned them back this morning, told them I'd go to the local newspaper &the mp.

Magically, they, out of goodwill(!!!!!) will change it just this once.

16-09-13, 13:31
Give yourself a pat on the back FA for making the call. I know you wouldn't have found it easy. So relax now and let go of the anxiety. Good job! :cool:

16-09-13, 18:53
Indeed..Can't wait for it to be over and done with now!

Although I'm not looking forward to going to the JCP...my local one gets EXTREMELY busy as it's in a..not very motivated area when it comes to getting a job.

Thanks for all the advice :D

16-09-13, 23:04
Good for you flowerangels. People need to stand up to them. I personally have no contact with them( in the support group ) but they had my niece in tears one day and we reported them to the manager. Sanction, sanction sanction. is their threat all the time. I also suffer from asthma and panic attacks, which is really frightening at times. Good Luck

17-09-13, 13:07
Thank you :)

One of the people I spoke to was the manager and I'm considering making a complaint about both the manager and my so-called advisor.

17-09-13, 21:14
Hi FA, if you do make a complaint, do ensure that you are feeling empowered, so that there is no room for them to disempower you. In other words, you need to be having a good day (I know they are few and far between), and feel strong enough enough emotionally to tackle them.

I would perhaps suggest you do it in writing.

18-09-13, 16:50
I'm working on a complaint letter and going back to it when I'm not anxious. :)

I may post it here when i've finished for opinions & advice!

18-09-13, 18:01
That's a very good idea hon.

18-09-13, 18:02
Feeling stressed, angry, frustrated, powerless and anxious really isn't good for your well-being. I wish I could give you a big hug and tell you everything will turn out fine in the end. :D

18-09-13, 18:08
Thanks :)

I'm dreading the appointment now..I have a bad feeling!

20-09-13, 14:16

I just got informed by the JCP that they won't be sending me a new appointment(!!, we agreed a new one on the phone. I even asked the person to email me as confirmation, which they did.) and I HAVE to attend my original appointment.

I'm just going to send their own email to me confirming the appointment has been changed. They can do one.

20-09-13, 16:26
Do not attend the original appointment. I would advise you to turn up at the revised appointment, taking a copy of the e-mail with you. As you rightly say - they can "do one" lol

21-09-13, 00:11
That's what I intend to do. If I get sanctioned, I'll send the section maker a copy of the email! My patience is wearing very thin with these imbeciles.

29-09-13, 22:39
I have given up..Looks like I'm going in the morning and taking my dad with me(he's had to change a lot of things round to manage to go with me.)

Dreading it..spent all of this evening in tears and trying not to have panic attacks :(

30-09-13, 10:56
I went this morning..just got back.

The advisor I was supposed to be seeing..turned out to be ok. This highlights the reason I don't like talking on the phone..you can't gage the situation!

I now don't have to go back until next year at the earliest..she also tried to push me to appeal for the support group(which I don't feel I should be in 80% of the time) and PIP..


30-09-13, 12:57
Glad it,s over and you can relax,sending you a virtual cuppa and a choccie biccie x

30-09-13, 13:51
Thank you :) so glad it's over & done with..she even asked if I wanted my next appointment done over the phone(which I declined, I struggle to hear on the phone)


30-09-13, 20:33
Phew! you made it girl - well done. It's over now. Just give some thought to applying for PIP - if your Personal Advisor feels it is appropriate for you, then jolly well have a go. I hope you are feeling much better now this ordeal is over. :)

30-09-13, 22:05
Having looked at a lot of information for it, I think I will be applying for it.

In theory(!!) I should be getting at least 12 points for both Mobility & care. I counted at least 15 for care alone.

14-06-14, 14:40
That's not good, I've been able to move my appointments if needed, and in fact just a week or so ago to help my DEA as I was going to be making more progress by seeing two people the day after I was due to see her, so I just said this is what is happening, and would it be more sensible to move our appointment until afterwards because of this. I've had no issue like this, it is discrimination potentially under the Equality Act, as on most of the pages they do say if you can't attend for some reason to let them know.

I would recommend making a complaint and flagging this with your MP as this should clearly not be happening to you.

22-08-14, 17:02
This really an absurd behavior but you know these days the world functions like this. Do not take stress dear sister as it will only increase your problems. As you have already spoke to the manager I am pretty sure that things will get better for you! :)